My last post was drab. I was full of ennui. Truly filled with boredom. And then I realized how stupid that was. I reflected on the school year when all I wanted was Summertime. I'm really trying to get out of that 'grass is always greener' mentality. I'm happy with my own grass, damn it! It may not be the greenest or the tallest or the most uniform, my lawn might not win any homeowner's award (is that an actual thing?), but it's natural and beautiful and it keeps growing year after year, right?
Cliché metaphors aside, my malaise was truly unwarranted. I have a wonderful life filled with incredible human beings that make each day worth it. So I have more free time than some of them which equates to more alone time, who cares! I feel like kind of an idiot for actually complaining about that. It's good to have time to yourself. I've been able to read for my own pleasure, something that I wasn't able to do all throughout the spring semester. And let me tell you, I have a lengthy reading list for this Summer that's only getting longer. And I'm so excited about it! Reflecting on my last post, I couldn't understand what had happened to the girl that could smile from ear to ear just because the sun was out and she could feel it's rays gently warming her skin (and insidiously increasing her potential for skin cancer because she always forgets about sunscreen). It's like I forgot about life's simplest joys for a minute. It's like I forgot how miraculous it is that I even get to exist. And even more so that I get to exist in such an amazingly beautiful world, and one of the coolest cities.
I remember now.
I also failed to reflect on my recent birthday, which was great. I even celebrated it twice! My actual birthday was on the 28th of May, which fell on Memorial Day which as is always the case, was on a Monday. I decided that I would just celebrate with my family and then go out with friends on the following Friday. BUT some co-workers and good pals thought that it was a crime that I wasn't really 'celebrating' my 21st on the actual day. So, following a really nice meal (not just food, but conversation and general good times) with my family, these pals, along with a few other friends, celebrated with me. And I truly had a great time with them! I'm glad they made me go out. They were way too generous and wouldn't let me pay for anything. Really made me feel warm, happy, and loved on my birthday.
Many of these same people showed up on Friday along with a few more friends and after another evening of too much alcohol we finally called it quits at four AM, after I'd gotten a kiss from a stranger. I'd say it was a pretty successful, if not slightly out of character, 21st birthday celebration.
I also experienced my first Pride yesterday. The parade was great! It was really cool to see all the politicians, churches, corporations, and regular human beings out in support of equality. I teared up almost immediately. It breaks my heart that some people are so intolerant and scared of anything that doesn't fit their heteronormative view of the world. Obviously, if I am allowed to have my opinion they should be allowed to have theirs. I'm not saying they can't be opposed to homosexuality in their own private lives, but to actually want to amend the constitution so that people who love each other are not allowed to get married, to essentially say that their love, lives, and feelings are not valid because they don't follow the same trajectory as you is awful. I just can't understand why, in a world that can be so bleak and alienating, anyone would want to limit two consenting adults that love each other because they are the same gender. It's incomprehensible. I guess, as kind of corny as it sounds, I wish we could all try to treat each other with a little more respect and open our minds and our hearts to each other. We're all just people trying to make a life for ourselves the only way that we know how.
Yesterday, I got to experience the tail end of the Twin Cities Improv Festival. Awesome. Huge improv Theater is a truly wonderful place. The people that are responsible for it rock and have so succeeded in creating a welcoming space for the community that presents hilarious, insightful improv from talented performers. And more. I've taken three classes there and on top of having tons of fun and meeting ridiculously cool people, I've gained a greater sense of self, been pushed (sometimes way) out of my comfort zone, and gotten more in touch with my inner kid, remembering what is was like when you could just make things up and really believe them without effort, when you could just play. Not to mention, I've volunteered twice recently and been fortunate enough to interact with some more really cool people. I need to get there more often.
Life is good and today is absolutely beautiful. Smiling from ear to ear.
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